NOT DESPERATE ENOUGH
January 29, 2010
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In fact, he had frequently been bound with shackles and chains… – Mark 5:4
For a long time, I tried to hide my sins and addictions — the result of being sexually molested when I was a
young boy. But the more I denied that I had a problem, the more I remained in darkness.
Why? Because I didn’t like to face the pain within me. I just wanted to go on with life and forget the past. Just
love God and do the right thing, I told myself.
But my bondages, like a hidden monster, which was a result of not facing my inner pain, were getting bigger
and stronger. As I tried to bury the dull throb of my hidden wound, and ignored it as though it wasn’t there, I
did not feel my desperate need for God.
But when I faced the pain squarely, and entered fully into the emotions of my grief, my anger and my shame
because of what happened, I saw God in a totally new way.
He was big enough to heal me. And only then did my real healing start.
Friend, you can’t heal what you don’t feel. Face your pain today and get started on the road to healing. Bo
Sanchez (bosanchez@kerygmafamily.com)
REFLECTION:
Is there a wound in your life that’s keeping you in darkness? Bring it to light and allow God to set you free.
Father God, set me free from my bondages. Grant me the grace to face my inner pains so I can move on to
the healing that You want for me.
1st READING
David encounters resistance and opposition from within the people of Israel but he never loses faith in the
Lord. He refuses to condemn these people. Maybe this mercy is a result of his awareness of his own
sinfulness and how, if judgment is made, he, too, would be condemned for all of his transgressions. This is
something we should understand as we are all sinners. As Jesus says in the Gospel of John, “Let he who
is without sin be the first one to throw the stone,” when the people accused Mary Magdalene of adultery.
2 Samuel 15:13-14, 30; 16:5-13
13 An informant came to David with the report, “The children of Israel have transferred their loyalty to
Absalom.” 14 At this, David said to all his servants who were with him in Jerusalem , “Up! Let us take flight,
or none of us will escape from Absalom. Leave quickly, lest he hurry and overtake us, then visit disaster
upon us and put the city to the sword.” 30 As David went up the Mount of Olives , he wept without ceasing.
His head was covered, and he was walking barefoot. ll those who were with him also had their heads
covered and were weeping as they went. 16: 5 As David was approaching Bahurim, a man named Shimei,
the son of Gera of the same clan as Saul’s family, was coming out of the place, cursing as he came. 6 He
threw stones at David and at all the king’s officers, even though all the soldiers, including the royal guard,
were on David’s right and on his left. 7 Shimei was saying as he cursed, “Away, away, you murderous and
wicked man! 8 The LORD has requited you for all the bloodshed in the family of Saul, in whose stead you
became king, and the LORD has given over the kingdom to your son Absalom. And now you suffer ruin
because you are a murderer.” 9 Abishai, son of Zeruiah, said to the king, “Why should this dead dog curse
my lord the king? Let me go over, please, and lop off his head.” 10 But the king replied, “What business is it
of mine or of yours, sons of Zeruiah, that he curses? Suppose the LORD has told him to curse David; who
then will dare to say, ‘Why are you doing this?’ ” 11 Then the king said to Abishai and to all his servants “If my
own son, who came forth from my loins, is seeking my life, how much more might this Benjaminite do so!
Let him alone and let him curse, for the LORD has told him to. 12 Perhaps the LORD will look upon my
affliction and make it up to me with benefits for the curses he is uttering this day.” 13 David and his men
continued on the road, while Shimei kept abreast of them on the hillside, all the while cursing and throwing
stones and dirt as he went.
P S A L M
Psalm 3:2-3, 4-5, 6-7
R: Lord, rise up and save me.
1 [2] O LORD, how many are my adversaries! Many rise up against me! 2 [3] Many are saying of me, “There
is no salvation for him in God.” (R) 3 [4] But you, O LORD, are my shield; my glory, you lift up my head! 4 [5]
When I call out to the LORD, he answers me from his holy mountain. (R) 5 [6] When I lie down in sleep, I
wake again, for the LORD sustains me. 6 [7] I fear not the myriads of people arrayed against me on every
side. (R)
G O S P E L
Jesus’ power stretches from the natural to the supernatural — there is nothing that does not come under
His lordship. In recognizing this, we also acknowledge that through Baptism we share in this power. Thus
we are called to give witness to it in our lives. How do we do this? By rejecting sin and temptation, and living
under the grace of the Holy Spirit and not according to the ways of the world or the devil.
Mark 5:1-20
1 Jesus and his disciples came to the other side of the sea, to the territory of the Gerasenes. 2 When he got
out of the boat, at once a man from the tombs who had an unclean spirit met him. 3 The man had been
dwelling among the tombs, and no one could restrain him any longer, even with a chain. 4 In fact, he had
frequently been bound with shackles and chains, but the chains had been pulled apart by him and the
shackles smashed, and no one was strong enough to subdue him. 5 Night and day among the tombs and
on the hillsides he was always crying out and bruising himself with stones. 6 Catching sight of Jesus from a
distance, he ran up and prostrated himself before him, 7 crying out in a loud voice, “What have you to do with
me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I adjure you by God, do not torment me!” 8 (He had been saying to
him, “Unclean spirit, come out of the man!”) 9 He asked him, “What is your name?” He replied, “Legion is my
name. There are many of us.” 10 And he pleaded earnestly with him not to drive them away from that territory.
11 Now a large herd of swine was feeding there on the hillside. 12 And they pleaded with him, “Send us into
the swine. Let us enter them.” 13 And he let them, and the unclean spirits came out and entered the swine.
The herd of about two thousand rushed down a steep bank into the sea, where they were drowned. 14 The
swineherds ran away and reported the incident in the town and throughout the countryside. And people
came out to see what had happened. 15 As they approached Jesus, they caught sight of the man who had
been possessed by Legion, sitting there clothed and in his right mind. And they were seized with fear. 16
Those who witnessed the incident explained to them what had happened to the possessed man and to the
swine. 17 Then they began to beg him to leave their district. 18 As he was getting into the boat, the man who
had been possessed pleaded to remain with him. 19 But he would not permit him but told him instead, “Go
home to your family and announce to them all that the Lord in his pity has done for you.” 20 Then the man
went off and began to proclaim in the Decapolis what Jesus had done for him; and all were amazed.
An Eerie Story
Imagine if you had been there. Jesus and His disciples had taken a boat in the evening to cross the lake. He
had calmed a violent storm and now they land at the opposite shore. It’s night and there, from the tombs,
comes this violent man, possessed by demons. “No one had ever been able to bind him with a chain,” Mark
tells us. Would Jesus be able to? He had just shown His power over wind and waves by saying, “Quiet now!
Be calm!” But demons?
One brief command by Jesus was enough to shoo away these 6,000 unclean spirits: “Come out of the man,
unclean spirit!”
There are many people today who say the devil does not exist. The devil must be happy when they say this.
Why? Because then they don’t fear him, they don’t resist his tricks and attacks and so fall into his trap. Pope
John Paul II once said, “One who doesn’t believe in the devil doesn’t believe in the Gospel.” It could not be
said more succinctly.
Now, many are afraid of the devil and his power. Being afraid makes one weak and vulnerable. And here
comes today’s Gospel passage. It demonstrates Christ’s tremendous power over evil. If we, therefore,
remain close to Him, we have nothing to fear.
In this connection, let me share what Fr. Amorth, the exorcist of the archdiocese of Rome , said about the
Virgin Mary as Satan’s great enemy: “On one occasion an exorcist friend of mine asked the devil what most
hurt him about Our Lady, what most annoys him. He responded, ‘That she is the purest of all creatures and
that I am the filthiest; that she is the most obedient of all creatures and that I am the most rebellious; that
she is the one who committed no sin and thus always conquers me.’”
With Jesus Christ and the powerful Mother of God on our side, what do we have to be afraid of in this evil
world? Nothing! Fr. Rudy Horst, SVD
Reflection Question:
How do I react to evil in me? Do I try to conquer my evil inclinations by turning to Christ? What do I do about
evil in my environment?
Lord, often I am not only bothered but scared of evil in me and around me. Thank You for reminding me once
more that with You and the intercession of Your Mother I have nothing to be afraid of. Help me to conquer
with You what is evil in me so I can be with You one day for ever.
Blessed Anthony Manzi, pray for us.
Meditation: 2 Samuel 15:13-14,30; 16:5-13
All of us have sinned some time in our lives. Maybe our faults are not as grave as adultery, murder, or the
other transgressions of David? (2 Samuel 11:2-5,14-16, 27).
Still, each of us has our own list of offenses against God in thought, word, or deed. Like David, we too know
these offenses. But how often do we face them in the same way that David did? He acknowledged his sin,
turned from it, and earnestly sought forgiveness and a restoration of his relationship with God.
David remained faithful to God—not through never sinning but through repentance and accepting the
consequences of his actions. Shimei cursed David and threw stones at him, even though David was the
king. And when David’s loyal nephew, Abishai, offered to “lop off” Shimei’s head, David rebuked him, adding,
“Perhaps the Lord will look upon my affliction and make it up to me with benefits for the curses [Shimei] is
uttering this day” (2 Samuel 16:9,12). How faithful David was! And how much God loved him, despite his very
serious offenses!
It’s easy to think that sin means the transgressor doesn’t love God, has a permanently hardened heart, or
has completely turned against God. Not so! David is the perfect example. God even chose to have Jesus
born through the line of David. David pleased God, even though he committed some very serious sins. His
acceptance of the consequences of his misdeeds pleased God. His repentance pleased God. His continual
pursuit of an intimate, loving relationship with God pleased him. He pleased God, warts and all. And do you
know what? You please God, too.
Even when David was miserable, suffering the consequences of his faults, he trusted that God is
fundamentally good and that he does good. No matter what we do, God is ready to sweep away our sin and
help us overcome our weaknesses. We need to have these truths firmly fixed in our heads. That way, when
we do sin and our feelings tell us God doesn’t love us anymore or that we can’t be forgiven, we have truth to
support us.
“Father, I repent for how I have offended you. Today, remind me of your unshakable love for me, so that I may
find my joy in you alone.”
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